


I Still Get Jealous

by TheSiren913



Category: GMM
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-05
Updated: 2017-02-05
Packaged: 2018-09-22 07:01:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9589877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheSiren913/pseuds/TheSiren913





	

It was exasperating. For the umpteenth time, we were having this conversation.

My flirtatiousness and affection towards friends made him exceedingly jealous. His anger towards me for being so casual about my sexuality, so comfortable with snuggling, so nonchalant about my conplimenting others made our relationship hard at times. It made me feel as though he didn't like who I really was and wanted me to fit a mold. While I was deeply in love with my husband, I enjoyed being flirtatious and comfortable in my own skin, and he didn't like the way he thought others looked at me.

I was crying. He was asking me again, "Why do you feel the need to do this? He was hangin all over you and you didn't do anything!"

My frustration boiled over. "I like to hug and snuggle with my friends! We weren't making out! We weren't fucking, for God's sake! Why do you have it in your head that every time someone else shows me affection that they have motives?"

He started again, "It's not respectf-"

"DONT." I sobbed angrily. "Respect? Respect means trust. It means trusting your wife to stop things from going too far. It means loving your wife for WHO SHE IS. It means trusting that at the end of the day, your wife wants to be with you and share her life with YOU. No matter her crushes, her flirting, or her flirtatious friends.

Im starting to wonder if you ever really loved who I am at all, or just the idea of what you could turn me into."

I sat down and buried my head in my hands. I knew I sounded ridiculous. Then again, my friends were JUST LIKE ME. I couldn't be that ridiculous. Was it just that my husband didn't like who I was? What I did? Was there really something wrong with me?

He sat and said quietly, "So if I had a crush on someone and I spent a lot of time with them. If I had a group of friends that were flirtatious and were hanging on me all the time, that would be okay with you?" 

I looked up at him, in all seriousness. "You have earned my trust. I have never doubted your loyalty to me, or your devotion. You are mine. I trust you to do anything and still come back to me. I just wish you could feel the same way I do. You are home. NOTHING changes that. Hell, you could tell me you wanted to fuck someone you are friends with and I'd trust that if you did, you would still come home to me. Thats how much I trust our relationship. Nothing is going to break this."

For a moment, all was quiet. His hand slipped into mine. My feelings of guilt and anger at myself for not being able to repress this side of my personality made my tears flow freely and quietly down my cheeks. I wish I could make him understand, but there was no way. He simply didn't see it the same way.

I just hoped that one day, he would understand that he was home. I wasnt going anywhere.


End file.
